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Thread: Taunts Take Brains

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
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    DFW, TX
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    Taunts Take Brains

    I'm tired about all the cracks about the tank not needing Arcane Brilliance. Have you ever taken a moment to think about what goes into a good Taunt? Sure, you can insult someone in your own species without pausing to think--but can you make him so angry that he forgets the the pain of that fireball he just took? Can you do it in a different language? To a different species? To things that aren't even flesh, or alive? Go into a warrior's home and look for the shelf of thick books. Those are the texts from his Taunt class. They're continuously updated to keep up with new species and cultural trends affecting what insults sting the most.

    It's mostly rote memorization, of course. The top lines for each race are kept current by representatives of each one's tanking classes. For nonsapient species there are research tanks who'll go into the wilderness and imitate the sounds that creatures make to each other until they find one that provokes an instant attack. Undead and demons are brought into special laboratories where calibrated chains measure which insults produce the strongest attempts to break out. Then the results are written down and young fighters chant phrases in unison until they get them right.

    Slimes are the worst. Sure, it sounds like a burp to you, but we've spent weeks at a time practicing to get that enunciation just right. And no priest ever puts Pain Suppression on your vocal cords.

    It's not just a phrasebook, though. Draconic is easy to pronounce and we've got dozens of different lines to throw at them. The hard part is using the right one. Dragonkin and whelps are part of a rigidly ranked society with true dragons at the top. You have to match the taunt to their social status to truly hit home. Tanks spend long hours watching their instructors pop up portraits of dragonkin until they can peg their rank from any angle. This gets easier as you go up the hierarchy. With Sartharion you only have to quote his adds back at him.

    Anybody with a match can set things on fire. Making a demon forget about that tasty warlock he's about to bite into--that takes brains.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    470
    Indeed, selenite, I agree with you whole-heartedly!

    That's why I always keep a few spare in my bag, just in case!

    (Great post. ;-) )

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    16
    This made a boring day at work a little more entertaining, thanks.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    1,753
    I tried flipping off a slime the other day, but it had no effect. It just sat there and wiggled at me with this weird look in his bubbles.
    Any tips?
    Quote Originally Posted by Kahmal
    ...there is no true progression for a casual anymore, just hand outs.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Germany
    Posts
    1,762
    Insulting slime is tricky since it doesn't seem to care about anything.
    What usually works for me is insinuating it had merged with slime of a different color and texture and very small pseudopods.

    SIMON DE MONTFORT, EARL OF LEICESTER
    pioneer of representative government who was
    killed in the Battle of Evesham on 4 August 1265.


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    On the cloud.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mačl View Post
    since it doesn't seem to care about anything.
    Hahaha

    And he doesn't afraid of anything!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Tengenstein View Post
    just don't let them melee you up the bum.

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