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Exiledknight
01-29-2009, 10:48 AM
First off I want to apologize for the generalized title, I really couldn't think of anything else. The situation I am faced with....I am the GM of a raiding guild and have ran into some major dram issues of late, they started a month or so ago when a class officer went behind my back and reinvited one of their friends to the guild, after being told he was not welcome back...now this caused an uproar and led to non-stop txt's from several guildies while at work. The situation was handled immediatley upon my getting on but I believe it drew a rift between the guild and that class officer. Now we are a generally fun loving guild and this past saturday was no different that any other week and everyone was poking fun at each other etc..well that class officer abruptly gquit and left. The following day I receive multiple messages that people wanted him back, long story short quite a bit of in fighting ensued and he is not coming back, now for the unique situation and spin. This class officer is family to one of my good friends outside of wow that I knew before playing, however this person now has began to stir the pot and frustrating many members, I have spoke with him about it and he claims his comments are in jest, I knowing him better however knows he spins things that way in order to make it seem he is not holding a grudge. I know what I should do and that is to tell him if any more problems are caused he will be removed from the guild, I think I am just posting to get some more insight on it and maybe not feel so bad over what actions I know need to be taken. Is this the right thing to do?

kolben
01-29-2009, 11:46 AM
You probably aren't going to like my answer. I'm pretty jaded and think some people in this game have gone off the deep end, complete loss of reality check.

First of all, as a GM you should come to terms with the fact that these people are acting this way about a *video game*. The problems are created by people, and are pretty much from fairy tale land and laughable. All the fits - betrayals - dishonesty - disloyalty - cliques - hypocritical standards - elitism, i.e. drama and whatever the hell it's about is all over a video game. I don't know about you, but that bothers me more than whatever the specifics were about the drama they started. Talk about wrapped up in a fantasy world, it's pathetic and scary.

I don't have a recipe for fixing this for you. All I can tell you is that I'm a firm believer in the "no drama clause", you start shit or treat people like shit and we kick you out of the guild with no chance of ever being reinvited. Same goes for /gquits, you have a better chance of being struck by lightning.

You more than likely have some personalities in your guild that are prone to start crap for attention. The only way to fix it is to make it unacceptable, and grounds for guild removal. Hold a guild meeting, get it out in the air. Let them know that it is not only really retarded but just screws up the game for everyone and won't be tolerated from that point on. Wish you could just count on people's upbringing, or inner-voice or whatever but you can't.

Directly to your question, if you reinvite this person I wouldn't allow them to retain an officer rank. I'd also pull them aside and let them know that they were reinvited because of friendship, and that drama is destructive and won't be tolerated in the future.

Good luck

Exiledknight
01-29-2009, 07:24 PM
In all actualality I love your response,as that is the stand I was 99% sure I was taking, I fully agree about the cliques, drama and whatnot being retarded in a video game. Like I had said the main reason for the post was to reaffirm the action I was already pretty much set on and to ensure that I was not the only one who felt that way out there.

bludwork
01-30-2009, 12:02 AM
when you have a guild with links like that, I find it's better to remind people that the guild is not some extension of their family or grp of friends, so any offline drama should be kept out of the guild. Mostly applies to raiding drama but it works nonetheless.

Dreg
01-30-2009, 12:24 AM
I don't know about you guys, but i generally see my guildies more than my friends or family. anytime you spend 20+ hours a week with people you will get drama, and all that other junk. it is part of the game, and the game is a major part of a lot of peoples lives. so this "its only a game" statement is really a bunch of crap when its not "just a game" for some people.

if if you tell people that a guild is not an extension of their friends wtf is it then? i prefer to call nearly every one in my guild a friend.

lorelye
01-31-2009, 04:52 AM
It's happened in every guild many times. Thing is not to let it get to you.

Kelstet
01-31-2009, 06:20 AM
If you have people that causing issues with the harmony of the guild you need to do what it takes to either correct their behavior or remove them from the guild. Just recently I removed a member of my guild for constant beratement amongst other things and a few members had issue with it, I explained to them that as a guild officer I try to keep the guild's best interest at heart and that said member has had many chances to correct their behavior early on and did not. They stayed mad for about a week but came to me to apologize for their treatment of my decision, I mean the members removal had caused an uproar in /g. You gotta let stuff roll down your back, stick to your guns, ultimately you are doing what's best for the guild it sounds like.

Kel

Úriel
02-19-2009, 03:26 PM
I too have had RL drama going on. I told them all this: "Look behind you or beside you. There is most likely a door there. LEAVE YOUR DRAMA THERE. This is a game, and we all pay a fee to come here and have fun.
Also, reminding folks that you have an open door policy (IE leave if you don't like our rules) works wonders.
Personally, I'd boot them both. If they can't seperate RL from a game they have no business performing in either realm.

Typhus
02-19-2009, 03:48 PM
To my own experience, when the drama starts its rly hard to make it stop. As a GM you have to be firm and fair. Treating ppl differently because they are friends who are being asses isnt fair to a guild. Even so its not fair of your friend to treat you like this either.

I dunno it might just be me but i always try to leave personal stuff behind when i play or administrating something. Treat ppl equal is actually the best thing to get a guild going.

Ppl who couses drama, aka dramaqueens should get a free ticket to the bootcommand. There will always be drama, but you need to be able to spot the Queens of it, to keep a stable guild

Logtar
02-25-2009, 01:50 PM
It is easy to say that this is just a game and the drama is not real. Kolben, I agree with what you say in your post, but in reality when you put more than 5 hours a week into anything it becomes more than just a hobbie, heck most people spend less time than that at church.

The thing that I can get behind is that I would like to feel like everyone in my guild is a friend. However, I am just turning into a casual raider... so not sure how that affects things or not.

While drama should be purged like the plague, it seems that a huge percentage of humans deem it necessary... it almost reminds me of the matrix not being able to be a utopia.

To get back to the original question, it is a tough one because of the outside game relationships. In our guild we try to keep those from affecting guild decisions... easier said than done. Make the best decision for the guild as a leader, if you are a good leader the decision should never make you feel guilty in any level afterward. Stick by your decisions.

Argamasilla
02-25-2009, 02:05 PM
It makes me smirk every time I hear someone say "Its just a game" followed or prefaced by some paraphrasing of "Get a life".

Soccer is just a game, but people are killed in riots when their team looses.

Some people are just very competitive, regardless of what they are doing, its much too simplistic of a view of human nature to just trivialize passionate behavior.

Amount of time spent is not the determining factor in how personally invested someone will become, but it generally holds true that the more involved someone is the more they feel they have to lose.

That said, some people will seek out drama as Logtar suggests. Those are the people that you need to distance from your guild even if you know them in real life.

Kanes Elite Guard
02-28-2009, 02:41 AM
The "it's just a game" response really is absurdly simplistic, and frankly quite ignorant. Yes, the medium for interaction is a video game, but within the framework, you have large numbers of real people interacting with each other. In that, it is a real social group; and is such should be expected to house all the drama you would find in any apartment, home, neighborhood, school, or workplace. Really not all that much you can do about it. Either fill your guild with as many laid-back individuals as possible, or keep in mind that you are interacting with other people, all of whom have desires, goals, and stresses in their lives within and outside the game.