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Grakkur
01-06-2009, 06:16 AM
He had cancer for a prolonged while and was in on his last stretch now. We spent time with him, me having work and school but being there when asked by my family and them spending alot of time with him. During this last period he was having trouble walking, talking and also being easily fatigued.

I got the news this morning and just a short while ago, I caught my dad sitting with a small lunch infront of him but not eating. He was asking me about death, why people die and such (me having had several friends and acquiantances pass away). Being that I had already given him my view and my answers before*, I just gave him a tight hug and saw him burst into tears for the first time in 20 years. Now I'm just in a state of complete calm and serenity. It feels good that our friend has found his peace and does not have to suffer more.

* People die, the only certainty in life is death so enjoy the time that is given and do what one can to make others enjoy it as well. Tomorrow is another day. As long as we're having fun. That is my life philosophy.

Feels good to ventilate this out of my system. This isn't the only forum I am writing this on. Cherish the time you are given guys, don't throw it away on sadness and grief.

/J

CKaz
01-06-2009, 07:07 AM
/agree post and for different reasons I've come to the same conclusion this new year

Tatt
01-06-2009, 09:59 AM
Grakkur - I have recently lost my Grandmother, and almost envy you your acceptance....I find myself numb currently, and already know that some time in the future it will finally hit me and leave me like it did your father. I have not told my children yet because I am afraid that will be the trigger for it. I hope your family is able to continue as well as you have through their grief.

Grakkur
01-06-2009, 02:38 PM
Grakkur - I have recently lost my Grandmother, and almost envy you your acceptance....I find myself numb currently, and already know that some time in the future it will finally hit me and leave me like it did your father. I have not told my children yet because I am afraid that will be the trigger for it. I hope your family is able to continue as well as you have through their grief.

Triggering the effect is a part of dealing with the loss. Not telling them is prolonging the entire thing and also not doing them a favour I believe. Usually when you find yourself numb, the "trigger" will not come from yourself but from outside stimulance. The earlier you find it, the sooner you can handle all that tumbling emotion. It's all right to cry. It's always all right to cry. If anyone tells you differently then they are utterly wrong.

To move on in life, you have to allow yourself the time for grief. Life is still there when you lift your head and dry the tears.